Like most Norwegians, Ole, a professional fisherman, was pretty dang frugal. But when his wife, Lena, passed away, he reckoned he better put an obituary in the paper.

A lady at the Olympics asked Ole, "Are you a pole vaulter?"

One day, Ole was driving along, when he got hit by a truck. He sued. And, in court, the truck driver's lawyer questioned his claim. "Ole, didn't you say to the state tropper at the time of the accident that you were fine?"

Ole replied, "Well, I’ll tell ya what happened dare. See, I’d just loaded my favorite cow, Bessie, into da--"

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